May 27, 2002

Riding To Tunica - Meeting Tim and Marliss

While we were out corrupting underage girls we stopped at a Wal-Mart so Garrett could purchase an American Flag to tie on his bike for the rest of the trip.  It looked pretty cool actually - the big black and chrome Yamaha with the red-white-and-blue flying proud.  I wanted to make a statement myself, but mine involved setting Osama Bin Laden on fire and then dragging him behind my bike.

While at the Wal-Mart we discovered a jar of PICKLED PIG'S LIPS.  I was appalled, bordering on apoplectic, at the thought of eating Pickled Pig's Lips.  It was the foulest thing I had seen or heard, or even seen or heard of.  That is saying a LOT . . but I digress.  So impressed was I that while Garrett was purchasing his Flag - I took the opportunity to purchase the Pig's Lips.

Here is Tonya, duly impressed with the purchase of the Pickled Pig's Lips.  She decided NOT to sample them and instead we shelved them for the night.

A recurring theme in our annual trips is the challenge of waking up Garrett.  Garrett's theory on sleeping is this, "If McDonald's is still serving breakfast, it isn't time to get up yet."  That is all well and good, unless you have to get somewhere and you don't want to be riding at 8 o'clock at night.  While waiting for Garrett, Tonya and I hit the hotel gym.  On last year's trip I had serious muscle cramps in my neck and arms - so bad that when I started working out again I found that my weights were MUCH lower than they had been prior to the trip.  

To show you how big a difference Tonya makes, on this trip I got up, worked out, did push ups, stretched, hit the treadmill . . the works.  It made a big difference.  After the gym, we thought maybe it would be good if Garrett woke up.  I asked him a couple of times if he wanted to get up - his response is not really repeatable.  I thought it would be funny to open up the jar of Pig's Lips and let the fumes wake him up - god knows they would wake the dead and then cause them projectile vomiting.  I opened the jar up and left the room as quickly as I could.  Prior to leaving, I was wise enough to unload  and take the clip with me.  Nothing is worse than a good joke gone bad.  30 minutes later the room reeked of de-lipped pigs and Garrett was snoring it in.  The boy is not right . . .

Several thoughts crossed my mind as to what fun I could have with my brother while he was unconscious.  I am sure I will go to hell just for the thoughts - so I won't discuss them with you now.  Let's just say they involved a live chicken, a large PCV Pipe, a Blow Torch, and about a quart of KY.  Instead, I just opted for this picture and called it quits.

Garrett did finally get up - and it didn't require a high-velocity-live-chicken-enema to accomplish.  Around 10 am we took this shot and headed up 55 for Tunica Mississippi.  You have GOT to admit that Tonya makes these pictures a lot more attractive.  God I love her . .

We actually had a fairly hard time finding a place to stop on I-55 to eat.  We rode through Jackson (which was a little scary, but not unbearable) and looked for a place to stop and dine.  Truth be told, we didn't find nearly anything until we got near a new Nissan plant being built with a surrounding metropolis being constructed at the same time.  Unfortunately, everything was so new that none of it was open yet - save for the Wendy's.  We stopped, ate and rested for a few - took this picture and headed back on the highway.

A note on riding - Tonya was lead and Garrett and I switched back and forth between middle and rear.  No big deal really, except that Tonya hit her stride of 90mph in the first 8 or so seconds and then proceeded to hold that speed until she ran out of gas.  It was like chasing a jackrabbit - once she found the big handle on the right it was every man for himself until we all caught up on the highway.  I took a few opportunities to wind the bike up to about 120 - and was pleased to find it had plenty more down there to offer.

One thing to remember - Tonya's right side mirror fell off.  It is not a statement on her Suzuki, so much as a statement on her husband.  Tonya dropped her bike on a trip a few months earlier and it bent the mirror out of whack.  Not realizing that the problem was with the mount, and not the mirror, I goofed around with the mirror until I managed to strip the threads from the screws holding it down.  Mr. Fixit I am not.  We took the mirror and put it in a saddlebag and decided to deal with it later.

Arriving in Tunica took longer than we thought once you get off of I-55.  The roads are nice, and windy, and SLOW - since there are no less than 400 retirees driving Winnebago style vehicles to or from the casino area of Tunica.  On any long trip, the last 20 or 30 minutes are just the worst.  You want to get off, you want to stretch or eat or just hop on one leg, and the minutes just drag by. 

Here is the first picture we took at the hotel in Tunica.  We stayed at Sam's Town Link to Sam's Town a nice place in the Casino District.  Here Garrett and I are doing our best "Bill and Ted" impersonation - for those of you who remember that giant of an actor - Keanu Reeves.  The Matrix 2 is coming out - and I only hope it is such a phenomenal flop that he kills himself in a fit of depression.  If he could take Mariah Carey out when he goes the world would be a much better place.

We had separate rooms in Tunica, and it was easier for me to just pay for the rooms and let Garrett pay me back (no comment on that). In doing so, however, we had two rooms under "Scott Poole."  Tim had been waiting 20 years and all day for us to get to him, and no sooner had we checked into our rooms than he had called Garrett.  "Scott?" said Tim, "No" said Garrett.  About an hour later - since we all needed to clean up - we met up with Tim and Marliss in Garrett's room.  Here is the first picture (ever) of Garrett, Tim, and myself, it won't be the last.

On for More

Take me Back